Disturbing Encounter

Well, I think this post will really be and indicator of who, if anybody, reads these things...

I went by the Goodwill store yesterday to drop off some of my kids' clothes that they had outgrown and I ran into an old friend there. He is someone I have known almost all of my life. We used to be best friends up until about 3.5 years ago. We went to grade school and college together, pledged Alpha Tau Omega together and were best man in each others weddings. Then out of the blue he had a HUGE transformation in his religious beliefs. I won't go into the details, but suffice it to say that what he believes and how he now lives his life are WAY outside the norm. Think of the most radical religion you can think of, and I would bet my last dollar that his beliefs are even more radical.

In following his beliefs he has undergone a radical transformation in appearance. He used to be a big burly guy. About 6 ft tall, but built stout. Maybe 250 lbs and strong as an ox. I would venture to say that he now weighs about 140. He also has a beard that hangs down to the middle of his chest and hair that goes half way down his back.

We made some awkward small talk for a few moments and then went on our way. He followed up our encounter with an email to apologize for keeping me longer than he felt he should have. I replied by telling him that in spite of his radical change that I could see the same person I once knew under the surface.

We have two components to our "self". We have our beliefs and our personality. Our personality dictates how we act within the boundary of our beliefs. His personality hasn't changed a bit. He was always a "bull in a china shop" and he loves to tell anyone who would listen "how things really are". No change in that, just the things that he believes. The dichotomy of his beliefs(very different) vs his personality(still the same) gave me comfort and despair at the same time.

Oh well, it is what it is and I will continue to move forward.

Wrigley Field...Baseball at its best!

Just got back from a business/pleasure trip to Chicago. What a great town! My only regret is that I couldn't spend several more days there.

Without a doubt, the best thing my wife and I did while we were there was to take in a Cubs game at Wrigley Field. It was a Thurs. evening game and the atmosphere reminded me of a college football game day at a big university. There were people everywhere and every restaurant and bar around the stadium was packed.

The Cubs fans are fanatical about their team and the game. They pay attention to every pitch, cheer loudly for anything that goes the Cubs way. I wish pro baseball was like that here in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. I love going to Rangers games, but nothing will compare to my day at Wrigley. I've been to Yankee stadium as well, but Wrigley wins hands down.

If you have never been to Wrigley, then I suggest you put it in you "Bucket List".

What's Really Important

My wife and I recently visited some friends. They have a couple of kids and they have a life style that is pretty different from ours. Their approach to parenting is pretty different as well. They push their kids really hard and they are pretty hard on them. Both kids seem to smile through it all, but I was left to wonder a couple of times just how genuine those smiles really were.

One thing I noticed that seemed to be missing in their relationship with their kids was the lack of physical expressions of love. In 4 days with these friends, I never once heard the words "I love you" spoken and not one hug was exchanged. In contrast, my family is very open in our expressions of our feelings. Which approach is better? I guess that all depends in how you measure your "parenting success". I suppose if both of my friend's children grow up to be extremely successful monetarily, then they will think they have done a good job. I have my doubts about how these kids will be as parents and spouses.

What really brings us the biggest joy or sadness? ... our monetary wealth or the relationships that we share with those that are closest to us. My friends are doing quite well in the money department. That's great and I am happy for them. Their family life does not seem nearly as rich. I just couldn't imagine not having a close relationship with my spouse and kids. It would make all the rest seem very hollow and empty.

So, what really is important? ... all the stuff or all your relationships?